If Only
by deliver.me
Summary: A parody of often used clichés in smut fics. A comedy of sorts.


_Disclaimer: POTC belongs to Disney._

_A/N: This is designed to poke fun at the overused clichés that exist in many smut fics. Take it in stride and laugh. I'm a W/E fan, and this isn't meant to mock the fandom...just horrible clichés. Enjoy._

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Elizabeth grew very excited as the carriage disappeared out of sight. Her father was traveling off the island for some reason, and she didn't really care why because all she wanted was Will in her bed. She sprinted down the road that would take her to the smithy and burst inside. Will was busy working on an important project, as he usually did seven days a week. Ignoring his cry of surprise, Elizabeth's hormones fueled her burst of energy towards him and grabbed him fiercely, not letting him go until she kissed him soundly.

"Will, I've missed you so much! I haven't seen you since yesterday!"

"Oh, Elizabeth! It's been an agonizing ten hours away from you."

"My father is gone away on business somewhere. Come with me. This is our opportunity to finally have the privacy society refuses to allow us!"

Will dropped his hammer and left the commissioned project behind, not caring whether it would be finished in time. After all, sex is much more important than earning money to live. The two ran down the street laughing like loons, ignoring the disdainful looks of the townspeople. Their opinions didn't matter anyway. Will and Elizabeth were in love!

They finally arrived at the door to the governor's mansion breathing heavily and burst through, anxious to get upstairs. Some of the servants winked at them, completely carefree because they were very secure in their occupations and had no fear of losing their jobs because they allowed the governor's only daughter a romp with the poor blacksmith. Ah, young love.

Elizabeth was finally able to shed her proper appearances and allow the sex craved side of her to take over. She was moving too quickly for Will and had to literally drag him up the stairs when he tripped because he couldn't stand up fast enough. She shoved Will inside and called out to the servants below, "You can end your duties early today. See you tomorrow…afternoon! Don't come in before one o'clock!"

With a loud cheer, all of the men and women in the house threw down the objects in their hands and ran from mansion, happy to be given the afternoon and evening off.

Even though they were the only people in the house, Elizabeth closed the door because intimate relations are much more intimate when the door is closed. As soon as she shut the door, she turned and jumped on Will, hugging him tightly and skillfully wrapping her legs around his waist, despite wearing a large restrictive dress. Elizabeth knew it was attributed to the sexual energy she was finally able to let out. This startled Will, and he carefully put her down.

"Is this a good idea? I mean, what if your father comes back? He will have me hanged and quartered and my body dumped into the sea because governors have that kind of power and can execute those kinds of things with no repercussions whatsoever. Not to mention, I don't want to take advantage of your fragile being because it's obvious you're totally incapable of making your own decisions. Add to the fact that I am absolutely terrified of hurting you because as everyone knows, the first time for women is excruciatingly painful, and you're going to feel as if I'm tearing you into two pieces, and you're going to practically bleed to death!"

"Aw, Will, that's so sweet of you! Don't worry. My father is going off the island, so he won't be back for days, which is perfect for us! And I want this, don't you?"

"I'm a man. Of course I do."

"Then let's have at it."

Will caressed her tenderly through her thick fabric, and Elizabeth groped him through the rough material of his breeches. There was an enormous bulge in his loins, and both moaned loudly as the groping continued. Soon, however, her randiness became too much, and she decided right then that Will must be stripped naked or they would all perish. The few days Elizabeth spent in men's clothing while kidnapped by Barbossa and rescued by Norrington allowed her to become an expert in removing such clothing. In no time at all, Elizabeth had gracefully undone all of the fastenings of Will's shirt and trousers and flung them away, allowing her to gaze upon his body for the first time. His muscles were glistening with sweat and chiseled perfectly (as all laborers' are) from his work in the smithy. It was obvious that Mr. Brown taught Will all of the necessary techniques to keep his body in shape.

After drooling over Will's toned abdomen, Elizabeth's eyes flitted to his erection, which was absolutely enormous. She felt woozy when she saw it, and was very impressed with the giganticness of his cock. "Will, god, it's so big!"

"Why thank you."

Suddenly, the overtly sexual Elizabeth Swann became uncharacteristically shy. As her knees knocked together, she squeaked, "Can I touch it?"

Will thought he might come right then and there, but managed to nod his head. Tentatively, she grabbed it and was flabbergasted to discover the smoothness and softness of skin. It was out of this world, and yet, somehow underneath the skin, the muscle was very hard. Rock hard. Hard as iron. Hard as steel, even…although Elizabeth had never touched or seen steel to compare it to, she was pretty sure that Will's erection could be compared to any nonmalleable metal.

Elizabeth had many conversations with Estrella, and from those conversations, she knew exactly what to do for Will. Her hand capably stroked him, and Will growled as most human men do. The speed was just perfect, allowing her to tease him while at the same time satisfying the instinctual male need to get wanked by a beautiful girl.

Suddenly Will grabbed her wrist, stopping her movement. Before she could react, another man-growl escaped his lips before he crushed them against hers. As much as he wanted to reach a glorious climax in Elizabeth's palm, the pressing need to tear her clothes from her tiny body became too much to ignore. His hands moved to the front of her chest and gripped the fabric tightly. In one swift motion, he ripped her bodice off her torso before attacking the material underneath with equal ferocity. As Will had never worn women's clothing for an extended period of time before, he was a little slower than Elizabeth in removing her dress. Her hormones kicked in once again, and she swiftly scrambled out of her clothes, leaving her exposed to him.

"You look just like I've fantasized about for years."

"Years?"

"Oh, Elizabeth, I fell in love with you right before I lost consciousness on the crossing from England."

She felt her heart melt. "Will, I thought I was crazy to think that one could fall in love at a second's glance, much less when one is ten years old, but you've just removed such suspicions because at this moment, I realize that I've been in love with you for just as long…if not a few seconds longer…"

Very quickly, Will swooped Elizabeth off her feet and gently set her on her very large four poster bed, whose curtains were billowing in the warm Caribbean breeze blowing through the open windows of her room. He moved to lie beside her and pawed her full, firm breasts, and she began panting in wanton, short breaths. The pleasure began to overtake her senses, and all Elizabeth could think about were the rough, skilled hands of the naked blacksmith next to her.

"Will, I have something for you."

"Yeah?"

"Stay here."

Elizabeth jumped off the bed and hurried to her wardrobe. She instructed Will to close his eyes. When he complied, she pulled a bucket from its hiding place and walked over to him. Once she was beside him, Elizabeth dumped its contents all over Will, and he yelped in surprise.

"Wha–"

"This is so sexy."

Will restrained himself from cursing because he was a gentleman. "What is this?"

"Chocolate! Chocolate is sexy!"

She jumped on top of him and began licking the gooey substance off his body. Once he was squeaky clean, Will lapped up the chocolate that had made its way onto her skin. After bathing each other with their adept tongues, Will's hands began to squeeze her breasts again.

"Elizabeth, can I touch your velvety mound?"

"Yes. Oh Will, yes."

One of his hands slowly traveled down her stomach until it rested between her legs. There was no need to ask her what felt good because Will knew. Oh, he already knew and was expertly stroking and rubbing her clit. Soon, two of his fingers began curling inside of her while his thumb rotated to take over the maddening ministrations. Elizabeth's chest heaved as he continued, and Will decided he wasn't doing enough to please her, so he eagerly began kissing his way down her body so that his mouth and tongue could join his fingers in action. His thumb and tongue worked as a team to push her over the edge, and she screamed when her orgasm plowed over her. It was so loud that it shook the walls of her bedroom, and her body clinched around his fingers so tightly they became numb from loss of circulation.

"That was so much fun, Elizabeth. I want to do that everyday."

"Will, you're a god. But now I'm ready for you to take me and claim me as yours forever."

"As am I."

By now, his arousal was becoming painful, and it needed to be satiated. Will moved to wrap his arms around her and kissed her tenderly before saying, "Like I said earlier, this is going to hurt, and I'm sorry."

"I'm ready."

Will pressed his erection against her and moved slowly – as slow as a snail – and entered her. By now, she was very wet from her orgasm, and he slid into her with ease. A third man-growl erupted from Will as a very girly gasp came from Elizabeth. Suddenly, Will felt himself hit a stiff barrier inside of Elizabeth's lady parts, and he stopped to apologize once again, as he was a very sensitive soul and hated to think that pain and suffering existed in the world. When Elizabeth gave him the silent permission to continue that also conveyed her deepest love for him through her eyes, Will had to use all of his strength to penetrate the blockade. Finally, finally he pushed through, and Elizabeth screamed and sobbed at the white-hot, torturous pain that coursed through her body. It was as if Will's cock had transformed into a knife that cut her from the inside, and she was absolutely sure that she would die at any moment. But as soon as the thought emerged, pain was immediately replaced with intense sexual pleasure less than a second after Will had broken her virginal wall. All it took was having Will inside of her and the love they both shared for one another. Knowing that everything would be just fine, Elizabeth moved her hips against him and discovered that the pleasure intensified. Will took the hint and began thrusting against her, able to match her movements with ease. His grunts and her moans filled the air as he pulled in and out of her with gentle motions.

"Yes…Will. Oh…"

"Elizabeth….uhhnn…"

"Faster…I need…"

"Righto…"

He was ecstatic with her request and began thrusting against her at a rapid pace. Deciding that her cries were not loud or erotic enough, Will lifted her hips into the air to gain a proper leverage. Doing so (as he knew it would) enabled the angle of penetration to change to something deeper and more sensual for the both of them. Now he was rubbing against her clit and special area inside with a delicious friction that drove her crazy.

Hours had passed, and the two were still locked together in a frenzied embrace of passion. Elizabeth had lost count of the number of orgasms she had and felt bad because Will had not yet found his own release.

"Will, let go."

"I have to make sure you are satisfied before I can."

"It's okay. Go ahead."

It only took him fifteen more minutes, and finally Will was able to explode within his love. It was the strongest climax he had ever experienced, and thirty seconds ticked by before it was over. Both of them were gasping for air but extremely happy. Elizabeth lovingly brushed his hair out of his eyes, and kissed him as her hands lightly flitted across his back. The warm Caribbean breeze helped cool the couple down after the intense sexual encounter. A minute later, Will caught a glimpse of Elizabeth's breasts and felt himself grow extremely hard once again. Of course, Elizabeth didn't object. She rolled him onto his back and straddled his hips, ready to ride him into the sunset and all night long.

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_A/N #2: I had to come back and edit this piece because I left out something...oops._

_A/N#3: Be on the lookout for a new project coming up this summer._


End file.
